This is why there are a of false positives in online dating. I have confided in my best female friend, who’s in a relationship. When I expressed the amount I get rejected, she was taken aback, and said “Women are silly – and that’s coming from a feminist”. I hear this a from people who believe that they’re the kings of compartmentalization, who believe that they have mastered the poker face and have so squeezed their negative attitude down that nobody ever sees it. This whole Harvey Weinstein thing has, rightly, exposed a gender inequality in which women frequently feel sexually endangered.You may get along great from the other side of a monitor, but once you’re sitting in front of one another… now you’re just struggling to get through the date in the first place. Before I continue, let me emphasise that I have given none of the below views, or expressed any kind of negativity, on any of my dates. As a man, I realise my privilege in being able to confidently walk alone after a night out, and meet strangers without feeling threatened. There is literally nothing good that’s going to come of this. with a corresponding problem for men that manifests itself differently – less of the frequent and acute annoyance, danger and fear that faces women, but the following (not even an exhaustive list): Alright my dude, you wanted to know about how to address this negative mindset. well, with a lot of these, you’re so off that you don’t even manage to be . – A chronic, never-ending state of being ignored by women in social settings; – Being effectively invisible to every woman you see in public; So I’m going to take these two together because either you’re repeating yourself or you’re conflating things in ways that only make sense to you.These are the Post-Mortems, where we dissect a letter and dig through the remains in order to get to the heart of the issue. Many times, we’re having to liberally apply the Chair Leg of Truth to a lifetime of beliefs.
Christian Rudder, co-founder of OKCupid, wrote an article on Jezebel that delves into the dating site’s data “built from tens of millions of preferences expressed in the act of finding a date.” The data reveals some pretty depressing results about what men are looking for in women. Before 30, they’re looking for slightly older men; once they hit 30, they are interested in someone slightly younger.
Throughout her forties, a woman is most attracted to men at right around the age of 40. All men, from those in their twenties to those who are fifty, want to date a woman in her early twenties. For almost every year in his thirties, a man is most attracted to a 20-year-old woman.
“If we want to pick the point where a man’s sexual appeal has reached its limit, it’s there: 40,” Rudder notes. And a 50-year-old man is really gunning for a 22-year old on his arm.
What these stats imply: “A woman’s at her best when she’s in her very early twenties. Or, you can look at it this way: Men’s expectations never grow up.
And while, yes, we are dealing with the consequences of the paradox of choice when it comes to dating, that’s something that affects men and women.