” Preferences Jessica didn’t look like I expected my future wife to look, but honestly that didn’t matter to me. But as I grew in my faith and my heart changed, my preferences started changing too. It feels more like settling to overlook a godly woman merely because of her ethnicity. There’s nothing necessarily wrong with having preferences, but we have to hold them with an open hand.
Don’t get me wrong, I thought she was beautiful from the first time I met her. My main preference was that my wife be godly, and Jessica was. I know some people who overlook a potential godly spouse because they don’t fit some random preference.
We ran in the same circles and we ended up joining the same church, so we saw each other a lot.
And the more I got to know her, the more I was drawn to her.
The immediate thought for many is, With all the gorgeous, accomplished Black women available, why didn't he choose one of us?
So it's no wonder we're thrilled for Black women who have found love—no matter the ethnicity of their partner.
But honestly, I didn’t agonize over it or seek counsel about whether it was OK.