It's very hard to distrust someone who seems to constantly be going out of his way to please you!
Only then, are you allowed to say something negative or critical.
This requires that a husband and wife develop good problem solving skills.
And let me say at the outset that, if you feel you are in an abusive relationship based on the definition I just gave, seek help immediately. Develop the skill of being a good listener, which is one of the hardest skills to develop. " Always make sure you've fully understood what the other person has said.
Being a good listener means you don't interrupt your spouse. A simple tool to use for this is the well known "mirroring technique." You reflect back what the other person has said.
When I own my feelings and opinions by using an I-statement, I am communicating that I am taking responsibility for the issue and not blaming my spouse.